oh the irony of Breaking Free.

Pathetic as this is, I just had to email my Mom to let her know that the only Friday I have left for the entire month of February is luckily on her birthday, so schedule it or be doomed I said!

This is my life, before a month can end the next is almost full.  I'm not complaining because I know that this is life for most people, what I am saying though is...SERIOUSLY PEOPLE!?!? Stop and smell the roses, hold your horses, enjoy the wonders of life that are all around you. As a person who feels the need to constantly be doing something every waking moment it is extremely hard for me to not fill up every blank square in my calendar with pretty colors and fun plans.

While talking with my dear friend Sarah today I realized a few things: I need to slow down, my life is too easy, but most importantly, I realized what it really means to be a friend. I've known Sarah since 2nd grade, she knows me better than sometimes I think I know myself. We chat often, fighting the unreliability of Facebook Chat and Haiti's power grid and she always makes sure that I answer every single question she has thrown at me with the velocity of a automatic weapon. If she doesn't like an answer that I've given to a particular question, if I've purposefully tried to just fluff and answer and move on to the next she knows. While she was expressing her concern for my busy schedule and what she might possibly think is an over committed person teetering on the brink of insanity (she may be right) she made me wonder what exactly I was trying to accomplish by filling every empty square with pretty colors of ink. I told her the crust of my schedule looked like: youth retreat, Diamond Smuggling, coffee fellowship, 30 Hour Famine, Motor Trend Auto Show and Bible study which will be weekly for the next few months. She said "Bible study" which I sarcastically replied "Yes, Bible study, you know that thing where we as Christians gather to fellowship and grow together" which she replied "no, I know that.." and before she could say anything else I said "it's called Breaking Free by Beth Moore" and then she went rambling on some more about color coding my life, and how she would get such enjoyment out of it, and about my schedule and how she doesn't like that I'm so busy and then.."you need some time just to break free". BAM! Oh, the irony of Breaking Free.

be still and know

I just came to the realization that...I love my life right now. This season that I am currently in could not be better. I have an awesome roommate, and a lovely apartment, a core group of friends who I couldn't live without and I am constantly encouraged by all of the little things in life that I have pathetically failed at noticing before.



Last night as a friend was praying for dinner, I was just overwhelmed with a sense of peace, definitely a strange feeling when you thought you were at peace before. Suddenly I was thinking...so THIS is what being still is.



Hopefully it wasn't just a coincidence that I was feeling at peace because I came home from a long day at work to a wonderful meal cooked by Mark and Josiah and knew I would be doing nothing the rest of the evening but watching a movie and waiting for the snow to start. I guess we'll find out!

New Beginnings

I was asked this weekend by Dan Rabe, our speaker for the weekend at New Beginnings Loft, "What is it that encourages you, and really makes you excited to work with the youth?" WHOA.. wasn't ready for that! I sat there for a little while, memories of late nights, inside jokes, bad macaroni and cheese, and injuries flooded my mind. I only have ever thought about this type of question a few times, and those were times where sleep was no where in sight and I felt as though I was definitely in over my head. Still sitting there with Dan, all I could think of were the little things. The times after we're done teaching when 1 student will come up and say "hey, I really appreciated what you said", or when we walk into a room and are suddenly group hugged by at least 7 girls all telling you how much they love you, or when life suddenly becomes more then they can handle and they call you wanting you to just talk and pray with them.

I started working with our youth group because I wanted to make sure that the teens didn't end up where I did. I thought that I would be able to save the 'younger generation' and that my involvment in their lives would immediately save them from a life of wrong decisions. What I didn't realize was that they would be giving me back so much more than I ever thought. I now know that even though they space out when we're teaching our lessons, they make fun of the games we think are awesome, and they make us worry and freak out sometimes, our impact on their lives is huge. Even if they don't, or we don't realize it now they are learning from us, they're watching our interaction together as leaders, they're listening to us pray and communicate with our loving Father each day through all of our actions. I hope and pray that someday they will be able to look back on all of their years in the youth group and be able to say that we have been a pivotal part in shaping who they are.

All of this to say, I love the Word of Life youth group more than words can express!